i saw him.

It was amazing.I am not sure what it means but for some reason I can't stop smiling, I feel like my heart is smiling and it is coming through my face. I am so confused yet so clear at the same time. I know what I want...I just have no idea where he stands. My head is swirling...but it is swirling because I am so happy and scared and excited and so curious as to what he is thinking. It was so much better than even my best expectation could have been. We walked to his house in the rain...it was a magical night.

I am just really at a loss for words. I think for a few hours I have felt what really being in love could feel like.

It was amazing. So what now? I am so scared yet so hopeful.

Sigh.